Afraid of the Dark

I remember the days when I was so afraid of the dark… and no, it wasn’t only way back when I was a child. The nothingness, the darkness, the feelings of desperation and loneliness, unable to clearly see the path in front of me… sound familiar? The ‘dark’ doesn’t only happen when the sun goes down and the lights are turned out at night.

Although it can be a scary place to be there is so much to learn in the dark days of our lives. But the first step is to accept the darkness, stop fighting or ignoring it, accept it exactly as it is. Believe that there are lessons to be learned right where you are that can and will benefit you (and most likely others) after the darkness has gone.

Through my recent days of darkness I started out searching for light in what I could do and how fast I could do it in order to get out of the reality of my situation as quickly as possible. After a year of operating in that mode and running on empty all of the time, I finally broke. Anxiety, depression, the constant feeling of being overwhelmed and tired hit me. I could no longer ignore or pretend away the realities of my dark days.

In this day and age there is a ‘drug’ for everything, a quick and easy solution by just popping a pill in your mouth. Sometimes what we need is all around us or within us but we just either can’t see it or haven’t tapped in to it yet. Yes, my doctor put me on medications for the anxiety and depression and, yes, it most definitely helped to take the edge off and see things a bit more clearly. But ultimately what helped me the most was and still is my faith, my family and my friends!

You see much of my life has been spent growing and cultivating relationships. I didn’t even realize or know that one day those relationships would be the exact and most important thing that would give me light in my darkest of days. Those relationships would illuminate my path when there was so much darkness around me that I could not see. Those relationships would be the exact ‘pill’ I needed for my current ailment. And those relationships would love me through my many days of being afraid of the dark.

When your gas tank light comes on to show you that you are near empty do you wait to fill your tank? Of course not, or you wouldn’t make it to your destination.. you would run out of gas and be stuck somewhere you didn’t plan to be and most likely didn’t want to be!  That light is your signal, your queue to DO something that will help you remain on your path to your destination.

I encourage you to spend time in your relationships TODAY… I mean really IN your relationships. Don’t just talk about or think about spending time with God.. DO it. Don’t just shoot a text or tag a person on social media, although those things are nice, they won’t cultivate the deep and meaningful relationships you will need some day. These relationships will be your signal in your darkest of days to guide you as you Walk On To Hope.